How to Handle Having Friends in Other Dance Schools

Competitive Irish Dancing is a tough yet rewarding sport, but one of the biggest challenges Dancers face isn't just about technique or stamina - it’s about mindset. When you have friends in other dance schools who are in the same age group, it can add another layer of complexity to your Feis mindset. 😵‍💫

How do you balance friendship with competition? How do you handle the emotions that come with competing against someone you genuinely care about? And most importantly, how can you maintain a positive mindset while striving for your own success? Let’s break it down! 

Understand That You’re on Your Own Path 🛤️

It’s easy to compare yourself to friends in other schools, especially when you’re training for the same competitions. But remember: everyone’s journey is different. Your strengths, weaknesses, and progress are unique to you. Instead of focusing on what your friends are doing, concentrate on your own goals and development. (And no, stalking their Dancing Instagram videos at 11pm isn’t helping! 👀)

Be Supportive, But Set Boundaries ✋

You can absolutely cheer for your friends while staying focused on your own performance. The key is to support each other without letting comparison or rivalry impact your friendship. If you find that certain conversations - like discussing results or Dance classes - are making you feel stressed or competitive in a negative way, it’s okay to set boundaries. Change the subject or focus on non-dance aspects of your friendship. (Maybe talk about holidays you’ve got coming up? Everyone loves the summer break ☀️)

Learn to Separate Friendship and Competition 🎭

On stage, you’re competitors. Off stage, you’re friends. One doesn’t have to affect the other. Respect your friend’s journey and celebrate their success while also allowing yourself to feel proud of your own achievements. You’re both working incredibly hard, and there’s room for both of you to succeed in different ways. 

Manage Your Emotions on Feis Day 😬

Feis day can bring up a mix of emotions, especially when you see your friends doing well or struggling. It’s okay to feel a mix of happiness and sadness at the same time. Acknowledge your emotions, then refocus on what you can learn from the experience (and remember, your result does not define you)

Use It as Motivation 🔥

Having strong friends in other schools can actually be a huge advantage. Instead of seeing them as rivals, use their progress as motivation. Let it push you to work harder, refine your technique, and strengthen your mindset. If they can do it, so can you! 

Remember: Your Friendship Matters More Than a Medal 🏅❤️

At the end of the day, trophies and placements will come and go, but true friendships last. Years from now, you’ll remember the journey, the laughs, and the support - not just the results. That is why Meg, Annabelle, Rach and Lauren all still have amazing friendships with Dancers from other schools in their age groups to this day! Let’s all enjoy the process, and appreciate the friendships that make the dance world so special.

Managing friendships with dancers in other schools can be tricky, but it’s also a great opportunity to develop resilience, sportsmanship, and a strong mindset. By focusing on your own path, supporting your friends, and maintaining a healthy perspective, you can strike a balance between competition and connection - making your dance journey even more rewarding and making friends that last a lifetime!